Hold on cowboy!
So you finally mustered up the courage to ask for the number of that ridiculously hot woman you met at your friends Halloween party, and she gave it to you! But rather than having any sort of a clue and playing it smart, you flood her with a dozen text messages that instantly send her running for the next guy who was dressed like a super hero at the afore mentioned party. You want her to know you are interested, and she wants you to be interested, but she doesn’t want to feel like you are a freakin’ stalker right out of the gate. Now, put down the iPhone for a minute and read some advice…
Survey The Situation
You got the number, but was she really enthusiastic about giving it? Or was she just being nice and simply saving your face at the party? Worse yet, was she just giving you digits to get you away from her? Get to understand her thought process and act accordingly. If she was enthusiastic, there’s no harm in messaging the next day with a greeting! Also, what about the 3-day rule? That’s crap. throw that out of the window. It’s all about the chemistry and if you were both feeling it then go for it! But be honest with yourself. You know if see really had an interest and, if she didn’t then don’t embarrass yourself… leave her alone. Her loss anyway right? because you are one hell of a guy.
Pace Yourself / Gauge the Speed
Just like sex… (sometimes) you need to slow down… other times you need to get to it ASAP. You glance at your phone and see a text from her. What do you do? Send half a dozen messages about what you’re doing, what you’re eating, or what you’re wearing? No. Just no. Curb that enthusiasm and go easy on her. Don’t play games but don’t come across like a deer in headlights either. Also, don’t message her after every couple of hours. You might have some free time but that doesn’t mean she does too. Balance it out and keep it sane. Overwhelming can be quite dangerous at times. On the other hand, if you are in the midst a flirty convo and she is typing at the speed of light then keep up the pace junior. Show her you have some fast and witty playful banter.
You Don’t Work for the CIA
You’re head over heels for this gal and you want to know everything about her. But that doesn’t mean that you need to start the interrogation! Go easy with the questions, space them out a bit. Usually, people tend to ask a question even before the previous one is answered. Share things with her if they are similar. Give a bit of yourself while you are learning a little bit about her. Another bit of advice, keep the generic questions out. Ask her something about a hobby or a trip she mentioned, and add your input if appropriate. It’s always nice to connect over a common point.
Treat Her Like A Human
You might be envisioning her scantly clad and/or bearing your future children but remember, she is a person and you are not quite there yet. She could in fact turn out to be a goddess but guess what, she already knows she is hot and doesn’t need you drooling all over your phone at every dumb ass remark she might make. She might say something which was meant to be funny but didn’t come off that way and the typical guy might laugh just to please her. But that doesn’t mean you should. Don’t be a yes man, be polite and keep it real. Women dig honest men than the ones who’re hell-bent on flattering them constantly.
Keep It Interesting
But none of this matters unless you get the damn phone number first! So, lose your inhibitions, grow a pair, approach the best looking woman that you see (or at least the one you are lusting over) and go for it. Nothing ventured, nothing gained big boy!